Liebster Award

The wonderful, kind, and talented Charity Pence has nominated me for the Liebster Award. Please take the time to go and check out her blog. You will find a lot of information, advice, inspiration, and reminders that we all are going through a fun but emotional process. So everyone go and check her out!

The Rules of the Liebster Award:

1) Thank the blogger who presented this award and link back to that person's blog.
2) Ask eleven questions posted by the presenter, ask your nominees eleven questions, and list eleven random facts about yourself.
3) Nominate eleven bloggers who you feel deserve this award and have less than 200 followers.
4) Post this award on your blog

Well, now is the time to get started on the rules! Let's start with Eleven Random Facts:

1) I am the president of the Creative Writing Club at my school. It's fun and exciting. There are so many people out there who want to write!

2) I'm about to turn 24 and I have yet to get my driver's license. Cars, driving, and the responsibility of such a powerful machine scares me. So I depend on friends and family to get me places. Hope to get it this summer though!

3) I am an incredibly insecure person and question my ability with anything.

4) I have an intense fan-crush on the anime character Hiei from Yu Yu Hakusho. I've had this intense fan-crush for about ten plus years and it has not wavered one bit.

5) I have very deep conversations with myself. Sometimes in my head, sometimes out loud, and sometimes they really aren't that deep.

6) I have never worn makeup, without force, till about a month ago.

7) I have gotten a lot of inspiration for plots of stories from dreams. I've also gotten a lot from hardcore daydreams.

8) I would love to dress like a 50's housewife almost every day of my life. Though I have a bad fashion crush on pencil skirts.

9) If I wasn't on the path to being a writer or in the literature world, I would probably be in culinary school.

10) I've never had a romantic experience. Ever. But strangely people seem to come to me for romantic advice a lot.

11) I love organization. I love to have things really organized and pretty.

Now time for the questions given to me by Charity!:

1) What is your favorite day of the week and why?: I think I might have three. It is hard to say which one I like the most. I like Friday of course cause it means the weekend and a nice break. I like Saturday because it means no stress and hanging out with my family. And I like Wednesday because it is half-way through the week and it's a fun word. I also have more inspiration during the actual week.

2) What inspired you to become a writer?: I had a post about this a bit ago. I've always been attracted to writing. And I was actually good at it though it never really clicked with me it would be my passion. After some time, I found I really enjoyed it and loved writing fanfics. My parents noticed a drive in me before I did. It wasn't until I saw the movie of the book Eragon that it clicked that this is really, really what I want as my career and life.

3) What is your favorite place? Why is it your favorite?: To write, I would have to say in just a nice quiet, but exposed place. Like a classroom or Barnes & Noble. I don't feel as inspired to write if things are too still or quiet. To be more relaxed, it would be home. I love being around my family. Even if we don't talk. To have fun, right now I really like going out and seeing movies or window shopping with my cousin.

4) If you could have only one story published, what would it be about?: Just the thought is hard to take, haha. But if I could only choose one I think it would have to be the WIP I am doing now. This one gets me excited and is fun. It is one of my first big projects and one I am taking very seriously. I will probably be the happiest once it is published (positive thinking!). As for what it is about, I might have to do another post on that. But it is about a girl able to save a fantasy world with a very unique gift.

5) Do you listen to music while writing? If so, what?: Oh yes! Sometimes I don't when I am actually writing-writing, but when I start to imagine future scenes or even future stories I go to youtube (darn iTunes music doesn't wanna work) and just get lost. It can range from techno and dance like Nightcore, to alternative rock (I think that's the genre its under now) like FUN or 30 Seconds from Mars to pop like Will.iAm. I don't seem to have one genre of music I always follow.

6) What item can you not live without and why?: This is a tricky one. Well, since it it not who but what I will exclude my favorite plush (don't judge me, he does have a soul!) and family/friends. I think if I have to pick a what, it would be my laptop in general. Having the internet and Word always at my fingertips at any time of the day is something I love. I love reading, going to Barnes & Noble without needing to get into a car, writing, always having music, talking with best friends, and so on. I think I would have very bad withdrawals if I lost this thing.

7) What is your biggest pet peeve and why?: Hmm, well like everyone, I have quite a few pet peeves. As for the biggest one...I think I would have to say closed-minded selfishness. To be so lost in one's own world, constantly, drives me insane. Like those who drive dangerously or always overlook what someone does or is unable to ever share the spotlight. I think it is good to share conversation about other things and other people and not have it always come back to the person. I have a fear I do this though. Also, another HUGE pet-peeve is how it feels like heavy/curvy women should be exiled. I think it isn't fair that in the media and just in every-day-life that women who aren't super skinny or perfectly in shape can be hated.

8) What color describes you most and why?: My favorite, hands down, would be blue. I also think that a light shade of it, like periwinkle or baby-blue, might fit my personality the most. I'm very shy and don't stand out much. I'm not an aggressive person and would probably fit more in a background. I think I am also soft.

9) What is your favorite number and why?: 6 would be my favorite. Not sure why exactly but I've always liked the number. It was always disappointing that this was considered an evil number. I also like the number 4 and other even numbers.

10) If you could choose one genre to define your life, what would it be?: This is a hard one. I don't feel like I have one at the moment that really fits into a genre. I'm very boring and a bit of a lonely person. If anything I might be a self-help book cause I would be used as examples of a before (weight, insecurities, and shyness) and shown with steps on how to overcome things. I would want my life-genre to be romantic and fantasy/action, hah!

11) If you could change one even from your past, what would it be? Why?: Another difficult one. I think one would be when I scared my mom to tears by playing too far, I was around seven maybe. That's haunted me to this day.

Questions for my nominees!

1) What was the first job you've had? What job do you have now?
2) What is your biggest weakness?
3) What are your top three favorite foods?
4) Who or what is your biggest inspiration with writing?
5) In a story, would you be the main protagonist, the damsel, the villain, the side-kick, or the background character? Why?
6) Where do you hope to be in five years?
7) Who is your dream girl/boy?
8) Confidence booster time! What are five good/positive/amazing things about yourself?
9) What is your favorite holiday and why?
10) When and what made you realize you wanted to write?
11) Quick! The world is under attack! What is the weapon you go for, real or fictional?

My Nominees! Please all go check them out and give their wonderful blogs a good read!

Simon P. Clark
Sunny Smith
Von L Cid
Randi Lee
Traci 
Mere Joyce
Camille Picott
Jennifer
Jenn

I'm a bit short! I will keep looking for more people to nominate :)

Don't Compare, Be Inspired

Insecure Writer's Support Group--September Edition

This past week, my good friend and myself started to talk about writing. We're both working hard on our series and trying to get them complete and out into the world. She is quite a bit further than myself and is progressing at a level I wish I could accomplish now.

But, I was surprised when she said she didn't feel like she was doing near enough. This is a girl who is working full-time, about to get started her semester, dealing with crazy family adventures, and life in general. And she STILL has a work in progress that is being written with great care, emotion, and time. Yet she still felt like it was not enough.

She was comparing herself to another author who would lock himself up for weeks and do nothing but write, hours a day, non-stop.

It didn't seem right to me. She is such a talented, incredible writer who is writing on a full-time schedule and she still doesn't feel like it is enough.

Being a writer, new to the field, is very hard to see the greatness you have in your hands. I think most everyone compares themselves to someone else. I know I have! Back to Christopher Paolini--the guy got his story out when he was younger than myself. How can I not compare myself to that? How can I not feel lazy when he got a best-selling, movie inspiring book so young? Or the fact that my friend is so far ahead when we started at around the same time?

You can't do this. It pressures you in a way I don't think is healthy. You're comparing yourself to someone different, with a different life, from a different time and it is not fair to you or your work.

If you have a life outside of writing, don't sacrifice it (job, family, health, school, etc.). By doing that you will probably hurt yourself and, in turn, your writing.

If you feel too pressured you're going to rush, you're going to lose your writing style, and you will add even more time to your schedule because you will have to go back and rewrite AGAIN.

You need to be who you are as you write. You also need to be fair to yourself. Not everyone works the exact same. Some work great on a tight schedule and under pressure. Some don't. Some are able to get hours in of writing during a full life-schedule and some can only get in thirty minutes. Some authors had nothing to do but write and the majority of people today have everything to do except write.

Don't let your confidence be shaken in who you are as a writer because others write more. Instead, you need to be inspired from their accomplishments. That author get published younger than you? Take it as a healthy challenge to get just a bit more time set aside for writing.

There is a difference between feeling pressured by comparing yourself to an author and being inspired by them. I need to stop thinking I'm not a hard-worker because I am not finished with my first book. My friend needs to stop thinking she isn't one because she doesn't lock herself up to write. And others need to stop thinking that they are less of a writer if they don't get something accomplished by a certain time.

We all have our own personal beat. Don't try to copy someone else's if it really doesn't work for you.

Another little advice to go with this: Don't be afraid to go to someone on occasion to get an ego-boost! You certainly don't want to make a habit of it, because as writers we need critiques to progress and evolve. However, it is because we are writers that we need to get some compliments about something that we are doing.

Writing is a difficult task, even if you're doing it just for fun. This is something that takes hard-work and  a lot of emotion. It is very easy to get lost and down because of how long it is taking to write something to the fact the work is getting rejected. Go to a friend, family, or fellow writer and ask if they can just tell you the good things about your work for that day.

Sometimes, the critiques and things that need to change or what we need to do to get better overwhelms us and overshadows what we're doing great on. So go out there and take in some positive feedback. You deserve it.

My Writing History

(new template! Feels a bit more fitting.)

Like most, I have had a dream to be a published novelist. Writing has been one of the only talents I have been aware and proud of since I was little. 

I remember, back when I was in about the third grade I was a shy girl (shyer than I am now) and didn't have much passion for anything. Then our class (of about 15) had a little writing competition. Just write about something in your life and I wrote about my puppy at the time, Hannah. I had no faith in myself, though I really wanted to win the trophy (a stuffed beaver doll). The time came and the teacher began to read out the winning story. I was so insecure about it that I didn't even recognize it was my own story!

That was the first sign to me that I might have something I am actually good at. Of course, at that age it didn't really click that I could do this for a living. At that age, you're mostly introduced into the world of being a doctor or a teacher. But so many things throughout my life kept bringing me back to writing.

When I was about eleven I discovered anime and then at about twelve or thirteen I discovered the world of fanfiction (through fanfiction.net). At first I wanted to write cause I was a typical fangirl with a Mary-Sue/Self Insertion character I wanted to have claim a bishie. But after really starting with my anime love YuGiOh and my fan-crush Tea (except for my one anime love (HIEI), I've always loved the female characters in animes) I noticed I was actually getting a fan base. 

Soon, I started taking it real serious. I covered different genres; romance, action, and slapstick humor. I went from different worlds (Naruto, Bleach, Yu Yu Hakusho, Danny Phantom, Harry Potter), created new worlds (the AUs) and kept getting popularity.

I was actually writing something that a lot of people were reading and enjoying.

But it still wasn't fully clicking that this was something I wanted to do. The thought was there, but for some reason it just wasn't obvious that I could try and do this for a living. There was talk about it, thoughts about it, but I don't think I ever proclaimed out loud, "I want to be an author."

Perhaps it was still insecurity. Perhaps I felt like I shouldn't be an author, it's not a "real" job. I do remember mom and dad speaking to me about it, that they felt like this was something I love. I think I might've even said I wanted to write a book. But I don't think I ever said "author".

Whatever it was, it just wasn't something that was ready to click.

Until I saw Eragon. 

I remember I had really enjoyed that first book. I remember that the author was so young and was already writing and doing something he really loved, and profiting from it.

And I remember how utterly disappointed I was in the movie. 

I complained the whole way back home. "If it was my book I wouldn't let Hollywood do that." or "It was such a good story, why didn't it get on the screen right?" of course, it probably had more of a whiny high-schooler tone to it. But moving on...

And mom asked me, "Well, why don't you make one yourself? You seem to like it. You talk about stories and writing a lot."

And I finally answered, "I will!" 

That was the for sure moment I made up my mind to try and be like Christopher Paolini. It has taken years, still far behind the man that actually got me to start doing something seriously, but I am on a more serious road in doing something that I hadn't realized been my dream for years.

Still moving slower than I would like, but I am obtaining so many years of experience. I am learning something new about myself, strengthening my writing, and meeting so many new people who are helping me succeed in this.

What about you? When and what got you to realize "this is what I want to do. I want to be an author"?

How to Write...

...when you simply don't want to.

 

Cause man, there are times I just DON’T want to write. I don’t mean a writer’s block, there are ideas there…but no drive to write them down. And it’s not just about my novel. I just feel lazy to do useful stuff. I won’t go and read and review blogs, write my fanfiction, write updates for my own blog, etc.

There is just simply a sense of laziness where I just feel like I don’t even want to pick up a pencil. The things on TV or YouTube just sound so much more intriguing. Even things that would typically inspire me to write just don’t shine like they would typically.

It’s like a whiny pre-teen saying “the world doesn’t want me to!”. Thank goodness, I realized instantly it was my own fault, but even that didn’t get me to writing anything.

So what to do when there is no drive to attempt to do any writing?

In truth, I’m not a 100% sure myself.

This round, I had to just let it pass on its own. Forcing myself to get into a writing mood, to think of a new post for the blog, even going and reading & reviewing….it didn’t work out. It certainly made me feel pretty bad about not doing anything, but even that didn’t move me enough.

It just had to happen when it was meant to happen.

But first a question; is it a real bad thing to not want to write?

At first, I would say “OMG YES” because it is emotionally taxing to not do your passion. I feel like I am missing out on opportunities. Deadlines and goals I had made for myself are slipping away. I’m being far too lazy for it to be beneficial.

However, there is another side to this.

Let’s look at it from a physical stance. Anyone who works out and does sports probably knows you gotta have at least one day of rest so you don’t damage your body. And your body can give you signs that it needs to stop. Perhaps this was my mind telling me it needed a break.

After all, you can’t look at the same thing every day and catch something new. A break just might be needed to find the things you were missing.

After this “lazy break”, I am finding new sides to my story, finding awkward things I had missed over, inspired to write about it in this post…and it is possible all of this is coming through because of stopping.

But, I will be the first to admit I don’t think I went about it the best way. I think I went a few weeks without any type of progression with my writing. If it was a Writer’s Block, yes it would stink, but it would feel more like I was sick. This, as a mentioned before, feels like I was just lazy and didn’t even try to become inspired.

Taking a break is one thing. Letting it work itself out isn’t that bad either. But I’m not sure if I made enough of an attempt to get over this lazy hump. I was simply too lazy to try.

So, in simple terms I always think it never hurts to try…even when you really don’t want too. Even just a sentence or two that you might scrap later, it is still something you did and tried for. If that is all you can manage that one day, well, you had a good shot!

I think it should be done, not because I am anti-lazy or having a pity-fest about my lack of writing, but because you never know what will be the thing to re-ignite the writing spark.

I’ll leave off with a quote from Writer’s Digest;

“One thing that helps is to give myself permission to write badly. I tell myself that I’m going to do my five or ten pages no matter what, and that I can always tear them up the following morning if I want. I’ll have lost nothing—writing and tearing up five pages would leave me no further behind than if I took the day off.” -- Lawrence Block (June 1981)

Always try. I don’t think there is ever a loss to trying, but there can be great loss in not.

Awards!

Thanks to the wonderful and generous Candilynn Fite, I have been given the Booker, Be Inspired, Liebster, and Fabulous Blog Ribbon!

For the Booker Award:

The Rules: This award is for book bloggers only. To receive this award the blog must be at least 50% about books (reading or writing is okay)

Along with receiving this award, you must also share your top five favorite books you have ever read. You must award 5 bloggers, with booky blogs you adore.

My Top Five

This is hard, I am unsure if these are for sure my top ones or not. But these are some I really love and strongly urge for those who have not read them to read them! They are in no particular order and some are more based on author and series.

Small Steps: The Year I Got Polio by Peg Kehret

The FBI series by Catherine Coulter

The Seven Realms series by Cinda Williams Chima

Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling

The Hobbit by J.R. Tolkien

Thank you so much for these. This means just so much. I really can't express how much this means! 

Randi Lee

Katharina Brendel

Andrea Teagan

Gina

Simon P. Clark

Sunny Smith

There are so many people out there that has such great, wonderful blogs! Hope everyone enjoys the awards!! And thank you, Candilynn Fite again for these! They mean so much!

Learning to Let Go

I realized after I posted, I missed the Insecure Writer's Support Group: July Edition by one day, so I will make this one mine, if that is legal.

I will start off by just saying life loves to get in the way of writing. It’s madness! But school and computer problems and illness just always sneak up and overwhelms you when you really don’t need it. And Princess Peach, you can’t just leave her locked in the tower! I mean…it’s not right.

Anyway, the distractions aside, it is time to get back to business.

I am in the process of another re-write of my novel.  At the moment the prologue is being rewritten for about the eighth time and I am finding myself at a point that most writers probably face: when you have to let go.

Except for about the first two or three editions, the book has always started with the line “Once upon a time, war was the dream of the people” and now I am finding myself so hooked on to this one sentence I have based every re-write since then on that one sentence alone.

And, like my writer’s identity, I wasn’t fully aware I was doing it until I had a slap-in-the-face realization.

My start chapter might start off with a line I am proud of, but everything following after has always sounded stale, forced, and just plain “meh”. Is that one line really worth it?

For a long time, it was.

How on earth did that happen? Though I am a writer and though I want to write a book, I can’t forget about the fact that these are just words. Though the words create something great, they are still words.

And I should not let a few words, a sentence, a paragraph, a page, or a chapter control and constrict the story as a whole. Things might be shared through the words, but they aren’t the only things that are contributing to the book.

So, I have to let these words go. Though painful, it is just what has to be done for the greater good of the novel.

I found I had to give myself a stern talking to. I needed to sit down and converse with Randi and myself before I finally deleted them and left myself with a completely blank page. It is rejuvenating, inspiring, and heartbreaking all at the same time.

Now, how to let it go? Well, in all honesty, I don’t think anyone can till they realize they are ready for it themselves. My best friend and mentor probably couldn’t get me to let it go until I was ready. Heck, the most distinguished published author probably couldn’t have gotten me to let it go either.

Because these words just mean so much during creation, and that love and pride just get in the way. Not until I or anyone else is ready can those words be deleted.

And man, once they are, I look back and go “what the heck was wrong with me?”. It feels like so much time was wasted! I could’ve let it go earlier and moved on! But I have to remember:

Not until I am ready. And everyone goes at their own proper, healthy, right pace. Rushing, typically, just won’t help. I think pushing myself is good, to work and try to get things accomplished after so long of not writing or to meet a goal…but like the words; that time-line is not worth the destruction of the story!

That, I think, is what the kicker is. When the realization that the story is worth more than this one lovely thing, then everything starts to fall more into play. But it does stink waiting for that moment to finally click.

What about your experience? Has there been something that you just struggled with letting go? Please share!

The Liebster Award

Thank you Andrea Teagan of The Enchanted Writer for this amazing honor. It means a lot and has come as a huge surprise. It means a lot for you to give me something like this.

“Rules” For the Award:
1) Thank your Liebster Blog Award presenter on your blog
2) Link back to the blogger who presented the award to you
3) Copy and paste the blog award on your blog
4) Present the Liebster Blog Award to 5 blogs of 200 followers or less
5) Let them know they have been chosen by leaving a comment at their blog

Randi Lee: Her blog The Emotional Process of Writing a Novel. She is the whole reason I am here and has been such a big support for me. Her pushing and encouraging words have always been an inspiration. I swear I cannot give her enough credit, awards, or thanks for all she has done. Her blog is also amazing and is the for-sure place for anyone to go and get some writing advice.

Jennifer: And her blog A Creative Exercise. I am just recently starting looking through blogs and finding others like me. She has a great blog with a fun style, embracing and discussing insecurities, has strong goals, and personal words. There is some pretty gosh-darn good writing there. I might be a newbie to her blog, but already I can tell she deserves this award.

Von L Cid: And his blog The Growing Writer. Another blog I am starting in. Another who appears who have started blogging very recently. The posts have great inspiration, he enjoys taking part in projects, and has a web book! Definitely another one meant for this award.

Gina: And her blog Diary of a Writer in Progress. With a title like that, how can you not be interested? She has a horror-novella out called Perpetual Night that is getting wonderful reviews and she appears to like supernatural (calling out to my interested, yet cowardly side) and has some great links and reviews of books. She is so close to the 200-follower mark, I just had to give her this award before then! It is more than obvious she deserves it.

Sunny Smith: And her blog A Splash of Ink. Really, so many of you have such great titles for blogs it’s impossible not to be drawn in just to see what is going on! She has some great posts

Katharina Brendel: and her My Writing Journey. Ms. Brendel, you gave me blog-envy. Beautiful and amazing on the blog itself and what is written. You my good sir…ma’am will be providing me a lot of enjoyable reads in the near future, that I am certain of. Thank you for following me and for your great words of encouragement. It is a great honor!

I also have to thank the new group I just joined: The Insecure Writer Support Group. It is because of this I have been able to find more people who share my likes and doubts. And more people to follow and get a lot of very needed advice. A highly recommended place for anyone on the path of writing.

Andrea Teagan, thank you again so, so much for this award. It means so much to me. And thank you Insecure Writer Support Group for introducing me to so many other amazing writers and bloggers.

(P.S: If I somehow mess up your name or gender, PLEASE forgive me. Me and technology/websites do not always get along. Typically I need to be holding Randi's hand to find my way through places like this. Look what I did all by myself Randi!! :D )

The Sunshine Award

My very first award here! I can't thank Randi Lee enough for her kindness in giving this to me. In truth, words are failing me a bit in just how much this means.

Never receiving something like this before, I will just be winging it a bit. Once the award is received, you have to put the picture above into a post and link back to the person who is giving the award to you (thanks again Randi!) You have to then answer ten questions or post seven random facts about yourself. After which, gotta spread the award along to 10 more bloggers!

Well, no promises that ten can be reached, but I will certainly aim for that!

Seven Random Facts

1) I have a bad addiction to journals, books, and school supplies. My closet is filled with untouched journals, I have no room for the books I have, and don't ever seem to put all my supplies to good use. But they are so wonderful I couldn't possibly part from any of them.

2) Polka-dots are my favorite pattern. I have clothes, bags, quilts, and a piggy-banks with polka-dots on them.

3) I am hyper organized and can fret if I can't organize things to my liking.

4) If I don't get to work-out more than four times a week I start to get stressed. Working out seems to be the best way for me to vent out any frustration and without it I start to get ready to pull my hair out and cry.

5) I have had a fan-crush on the same anime character for over ten years.

6) I am twenty-three yet have never had, nor wanted, to drink liquor.

7) Still have not read the last Harry Potter book

And the award goes to...

Well I haven't made my way through a lot of blogs just yet. But the ones to receive this award are those who are providing very inspirational, enjoyable, advice-filled blogs that truly deserve as many awards as possible.

J.W. Alden
Diana Carlisle
Ivy Lee

Thank you so much again Randi for this. This truly means a lot to me :) thank you.